How many friends do you have in your facebook list? I would get hundreds, out of which tens matter the most to you. The saddest part is that not always the close friends remember to write you, but as well other friends and acquintances, having slightly more time or willing to chat. You are in the trap to feel yourself social by having random chats and not finding the time for taking the responsibility to write yourself to those, who matter you the most. In other words, it is difficult to keep reacting to the messages you get rather than starting to act yourself.
One of my friends shared his thoughts, that just ruined my intuition about writing only by the inspiration. He was slightly desparate, telling “I thought, that you do not write, because you do not care”. I tried to prove him wrong, later I got to a conclusion, that there is a bit of truth in his words. Hehe, you see, my friends are my teachers. Of course, life is busy and we live our own lives, but one should keep the place for communications, for calls without the reason. There is a balance between living your own life and being social, but keeping the place for several best friends in your heart seems like to right thing to do.
Why do we need to be proactive in keeping with touch with people, we care about? I decided to gather the list of reasons, that make me and you 100% sure, that one needs to take the initiative for starting the communication.
- We need to be ready to give a hand. Without keeping in touch, you may miss the moment to be there for the person. Believe me, sometimes we underestimate how much other person can help with his opinion and support.
- Keeping in touch and spending time together means more happy moments in your life.
- Keeping in touch can be done to share something useful, that means that we try to influence friend’s life in a positive way.
- Keeping in touch means you can build priorities in your life and are able to be with people, you really like. It means your consistency and devotion to the relations. It means you will not having the problem of keeping your family as the priority as well.
- Keeping in touch means you don’t forget social life and your social life is more meaningful, rather than spending time on intertainment or random aquaintances. Goodbye games, hello friends.
- Keeping in touch means thinking outside of your inner world and trying to go out of your shell. It decreases your ego. Hello introvers!
- Keeping in touch means the opportunity to affect the future of your friends by proper discussions and good advices. To reach that spend more time talking about your future desires, and less time about your past. Lera you can do that so good!
- Keeping in touch means living your experiences twice: in real life and while talking about them to a friend. It can mean increasing your happiness by telling about positive experiences. Please do not repeat much difficult experiences, you multiply them by saying them again. Tell them only to people, who can give a constructive feedback.
- Keeping in touch gives a sence of safety. People with good friends feel safer and more courages in life, they overcome obstacles easier. When we are loved and appreciated, self-esteem increases and we try to perform better and keep people’s slightly higher expectations. Praise sometimes your friends, that works for good. The same principle works in family.
No matter, how many friends you have and how often you try to keep in touch, the conclusion is here: you need to be proactive and initiate the meetings, talks and messages. This is the position of caring, proactive and responsible person. Those meetings could be rare, as long as you accept both big gaps, but the quality of spent time together matters. Responsibility for the relations can not be delegated, this is one of our primary tasks and believe me, you will live much more satisfied and fullfilled life with relations, that bring so much meaning to us.
To take the benefit from this article, answer yourself and reflect on these questions:
- Find out who are the people to take care about especially?
- How you could change the content of your talks to enjoy and contribute more to the life of your friend?
- Do you respond easily to the messages of your aquaintances forgetting about the people who matter more to you? If yes, what you could do about it?
“The wealth I have won in my life I cannot bring with me. What I can bring is only the memories precipitated by love. Treasure Love for your family, love for your spouse, love for your friends…Treat yourself well. Cherish others“, – those were the last words of Steve Jobs, perhaps, he is right.
P.S. Thank you, D. for your tough words, they inspired me for this article. The question of keeping in touch was my long dilemma, now the things became clearer to me.